The average person has no way to break because he just wants, not necessarily. As I mentioned earlier, as long as you must, there must be a method. There must be a way to succeed, and there must be a reason for failure. If you haven't succeeded yet, it's because your method hasn't found it right. If you are still stuck in the status quo, there must be some reasons for failure.
I think the reason why a person can't break through the former reason is that he is thinking about what he doesn't want every time. For example, some people are worried that income is not enough. He is talking every day. What if I don’t have enough money? In case I don't have enough money... When I think about it, I am already doomed to have enough money. Because thought is the cause, the environment is the result. Your environment is the result of your thoughts, so what do you think, you will get results.
Losers always love to find reasons for failure
When a person always wants him not to do it, he has no way to break through.
To give an example, I have a very good friend, 35 years old, still have no girlfriend, I always wanted to introduce my girlfriend to him. I asked him if I could tell you the conditions, maybe I can help you introduce them.
He said: "The former thought should be conservative. The second behavior should be open; the third style should be bold." When it comes to the fourth, he said: "The woman must come to me to take the initiative." I said: "I See you are afraid of being rejected! Every time you want to ask her to go out, what do you think?" He said: "I want her to look at me with a full face, she said no, she refused me..." I said: " Have you ever thought about what to do if she promised?" He said: "No!" I said: "If you want to think, why don't you want to be good? In case she can't wait to call you, and you don't Call her, call someone by her, what should she do when she goes out with others? Who is the loss? It must be your loss, right?" Say: "Yes! Why didn't I think so?" I said: "Because you have been trapped by your inertia! You are thinking about what you don't want."
Ask an expert to help yourself
Everyone has a blind spot for thinking. The bigger misfortune is that you can't break through the blind spots of your own thinking. Because since it is a blind spot, you need to use someone to guide you. Many obstacles are in fact limited by the blind spots of self-thinking.
Many large companies hire outside consultants. It is not that foreign monks will chanting, but because outsiders can see things from different angles, so that the effect of solving problems will be better.
The average person has no way to act, or because of old problems - he does not know what he wants. If I am sure I am going to buy a dunhill blue suit today, worth 35,000. When I go to the store to see it, if there is, I will buy it immediately. But if I am not sure, I will hesitate to act immediately.
Two reasons for action pursue happiness and escape from pain
There is no way for a person to break through and there is no way to act. He does not understand the source of action. In fact, each individual's actions can usually be summed up in two points: the front point is that he is pursuing happiness; the second point is to escape the pain.
I often ask my students at the lecture: "Please raise your hand if you want to succeed?" They all raised their hands. I said, "Please raise your hand if you want to increase your income?" They also raised their hands. I said, "If you want to make yourself happier and make your family more happy, please raise your hand?" They still raised their hands. I said, "Please raise your hand now." Most of the people did not raise their hands. I said that since you think so, why didn't you reach it? Because we are afraid of failure, we are afraid of being rejected, and we are afraid to act. I said that if you don't act, will you succeed? will not. If you don't visit customers, will your performance improve? will not. I know that I won't. Why are you still not moving?
The key is because their fears outweigh the sense of accomplishment or happiness they can get.
Escape from suffering is a big motivation
The influence of a person fleeing from pain is greater than the pursuit of happiness. Like everyone wants to succeed, but every time he visits a customer, he is thinking of being rejected by the customer, and the power of rejection destroys his desire to succeed.
Many people have no way to break through. I asked him: "Is this what you want?" He said: "No." I said, "What are the consequences if you don't change?" He said: "It's miserable." I said "How terrible?" He began to describe, oh, what would happen... what would happen... how miserable... how miserable... I said: "Doesn't change after five years?" He said: "How is this? Yes." I said: "Is it still unchanged after ten years?" He said: "I will commit suicide." I said: "If it is twenty years?" He said: "Then I must hide from seeing people. â€
Imagine the disadvantages of not acting, the immediate benefits of action
In fact, he knew that he wanted to change, but he did not think of long-term negative influence. To make yourself act, you must first study the negative effects of your long-term inaction. You are not visiting customers now, will your performance improve? Will you be more successful in the future? You don't take that step now, don't dare to break through psychological barriers, what are the negative effects after ten years?
What to start with from a bad place, and then think about how much I can do if I act now, how much happiness it will bring, how happy I am, how much money I can make, and how to build my relationships. How good it is to make my family happy and happy.
No action because the pain is not enough
When you first give yourself pain and give yourself happiness, you feel that this action is worthwhile. However, most people only use the motivation to pursue happiness. The average person has no way to convince his customers to buy, there is no way to influence others, because he always uses happiness to motivate others.
In fact, some people need to use pain, the key is here. You have not acted because the pain is not enough. Many people will stand up immediately after bankruptcy, and later become millionaires. Why? Because he feels that bankruptcy is painful, this is not what he wants. He does not want to stay in place forever, never feel safe, and never have economic independence. He has a dream, but he does not know that his plan of action and plans will not be realized.
Change is first depends on the will.
To make things change, you have to change first. To make things better, you must first make yourself better. To make your goals achievable and to make breakthroughs quickly, you must change yourself quickly. To make your goals achievable, and to make yourself break through, you must find ways to break through. But in fact, there are too many ways to break through. The key is that your wishes are not enough. Ninety-nine percent of the willingness to add a better method is still ineffective, because there is still 1% you may give up. There is no way, but people who are very willing will find a way to come sooner or later. I believe that you will agree with this idea. Remember, change depends first on will, then on the method.
Changing skills is easy to change attitudes
In fact, this has been experienced many times in me. Whenever I decide to do something, even if I can't find a way, I will try my best to come up with a method, even if it is not a very efficient method, at least I will finish it. But when my intentions are not very strong, there is no motivation at this time.
There are a lot of supervisors who have been studying the problems of their subordinates. There are only two problems under them. One is the attitude problem and the other is the skill problem.
You can ask yourself, is your subordinate having a problem with your attitude or is there a problem with your skills? If there is a problem with the skills below, it is your problem. If there is a problem with the attitude of the subordinates, that is his problem. Most people like to change the attitude of others, but this person is not willing to do, do not want to do, then you have no way to take him. Does he want to break through? Does he have to break through? Is he going to break through now? If he is going to break through tomorrow, I am not interested.
Are you "wanted" or "must be"
In my successful seminar, a senior Malaysian director told me: "Mr. Chen, I want to quit smoking." I said, "Do you want 'or want' or 'must?'" "Well... um... ... um..." "Do you want to?" "Well... um... um..." After asking a few times, he said, "Think."
"When do you want to? Is it after ten years, five years later? One year later? Still thinking now?" "Well... um... um..." "According to your current thinking, will you quit smoking successfully?" Say: "No." "Would you like to stop?" "Yes." "Isn't that contradictory? When are you going?" "Now." "So what is your current problem?"
"No problem."
As long as you believe that you can do it, you can do it.
In fact, the key is whether he has decided to do it now. As long as you want it now, you must have a method. As long as you believe that you can, you must do it. All things and goals, as long as you are very eager, you can achieve. The same is true for all obstacles. You have not broken through because you are not active enough. You have not broken through because the pain is not enough. You haven't made a breakthrough yet because the happiness of the breakthrough is not enough.
As long as you can influence yourself with the power to pursue happiness and escape from pain, your mobility will multiply.
But there are many people who will still make excuses. I can't, I can't, I don't have enough time, too much money, too expensive, too wasteful, too extravagant, and ineffective. Is there any excuses to help? In fact not. Everyone must exclude excuses, 100% responsible for their own lives, dare to admit mistakes, act quickly, learn a lot, and you have a chance to succeed.
Act now.
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